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How to Tell if Your Loved One Is Sundowning: The Signs Most Families Miss
If you're wondering whether your loved one's behaviors fit the pattern of sundowning, use this quick guide to identify symptoms, causes and solutions.
shawneecanjura
Jul 164 min read


The Power of "Yes, And": One of the Most Effective Communication Strategies in Dementia Care
TL;DR "Yes, and..." means accepting your loved one's emotional reality instead of arguing with it. You don't have to agree with false facts—you simply avoid creating unnecessary conflict. After validating what they're saying, gently redirect the conversation toward something comforting or enjoyable. This technique often reduces arguments, preserves trust, and makes daily interactions much more pleasant. The goal isn't to prove who's right. The goal is to help your loved one f
shawneecanjura
Jun 294 min read


Therapeutic Fibbing: Is It Ever Okay to Lie to Someone With Dementia?
TL;DR Therapeutic fibbing is the intentional use of a harmless, compassionate untruth to reduce distress—not manipulate someone with dementia. It may be appropriate when telling the literal truth repeatedly causes fear, grief, or agitation without improving understanding. The best therapeutic fibs focus on providing reassurance, comfort, or redirecting attention. Humor can sometimes accomplish the same goal while creating moments of genuine connection. The goal isn't to win a
shawneecanjura
Jun 294 min read


Understanding Anosognosia: Why Your Loved One With Dementia Doesn't Think Anything Is Wrong
There was one word that completely changed the way I cared for my mom. Actually, that's not quite true. Learning the word changed my caregiving in two phases. The first phase was simply learning that the word existed. The second—and much more important—phase was finally understanding what it actually meant. For a long time, I couldn't understand how my mom could forget something she'd done her entire life, like how to open the refrigerator, and then immediately insist there w
shawneecanjura
Jun 295 min read


Why Do People With Dementia Ask the Same Question Over and Over?
Repetitive questions are caused by changes in the brain, not laziness or stubbornness. Correcting or shaming someone with dementia rarely helps and often increases frustration. Humor, surprise, and changing the environment can interrupt repetitive thought loops more effectively than repeated explanations. The goal isn't to stop every question—it's to make the interaction less stressful for both of you. Sometimes the best dementia caregiving strategy is learning to laugh toget
shawneecanjura
Jun 295 min read


How to Respond When Someone With Dementia Refuses Medication
Learn why people with dementia refuse medication, including anosognosia, fear, confusion, swallowing difficulties, side effects, and suspicion. Get practical strategies for increasing medication cooperation without arguing, including taking medications together, pairing pills with daily routines, and focusing on comfort rather than compliance. Find out when it may be appropriate to hide medication in food, which foods work best (including why chocolate ice cream is often one
shawneecanjura
Jun 238 min read


How to Convince a Parent With Dementia to Shower
How we all wish our loved one felt about shower time! If there is one caregiving challenge that seems almost universal, it's bathing. Many adult children find themselves asking: "Why won't my mom shower?" or "How do I convince my dad to bathe?" A parent who once cared deeply about personal hygiene may suddenly refuse showers, become angry when bathing is suggested, or insist they already showered when they clearly haven't. These situations can be frustrating, confusing, and s
shawneecanjura
Jun 154 min read


Refusal Of Care: When Mom Won't Let You Help Her
Few experiences are more frustrating for adult children than watching a parent struggle while refusing the very help they clearly need. You notice the missed medications. The unpaid bills. The expired food in the refrigerator. The repeated stories. The forgotten appointments. The increasing confusion. Yet every attempt to help is met with resistance. "I'm fine." "I don't need help." "Stop treating me like a child." "There's nothing wrong with me." For many caregivers, these c
shawneecanjura
Jun 154 min read


Why Do People With Dementia Think Someone Is Stealing From Them?
Charlie Day from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia exhibits paranoid behavior similar to a dementia patient FX Networks One of the most hurtful and frustrating experiences many caregivers face is being accused of stealing. A loved one may insist that money is missing, jewelry has been taken, important papers have disappeared, or that someone has entered the home and removed personal belongings. These accusations can be especially painful when they are directed at the very peo
shawneecanjura
Jun 154 min read


Why Do Dementia Patients Get Angry? Understanding the Real Cause Behind Dementia-Related Anger
One of the most painful and confusing experiences for many caregivers is watching a loved one become angry, irritable, or even aggressive. A person who was once patient and easygoing may suddenly lash out, accuse others of wrongdoing, refuse help, or become upset over seemingly minor situations. When this happens, many caregivers begin asking: Why is my loved one with dementia so angry? The answer is often more complicated than it appears. In many cases, the anger itself is n
shawneecanjura
Jun 154 min read


What Questions Should I Ask After a Dementia Diagnosis?
A dementia diagnosis often raises more questions than it answers. Many families spend months or even years trying to understand what is happening to their loved one. Then, after finally receiving a diagnosis, they find themselves sitting in a doctor's office struggling to think of what to ask next. If this sounds familiar, you're not alone. Receiving a dementia diagnosis can be emotionally overwhelming. It's common to leave the appointment and later realize you forgot to ask
shawneecanjura
Jun 154 min read


The Grief That Begins Before a Loved One Is Gone
Most people associate grief with death. But for many families affected by dementia, grief begins long before a loved one is gone. In fact, some caregivers begin grieving before a diagnosis is ever made. They grieve changes in personality. They grieve changes in communication. They grieve shared dreams, traditions, and expectations for the future. By the time a dementia diagnosis arrives, many caregivers have already been carrying grief for months or even years without realizi
shawneecanjura
Jun 153 min read


Finding Hope After a Dementia Diagnosis
A dementia diagnosis can feel like the moment life divides into two parts: before and after. Many families leave the doctor's office carrying more than a diagnosis. They leave carrying fear, uncertainty, grief, and a thousand unanswered questions about the future. What will happen next? How quickly will things change? Will life ever feel normal again? Will there be anything left to look forward to? For many caregivers, one of the hardest parts of a dementia diagnosis is not t
shawneecanjura
Jun 153 min read


How to Talk to Family Members About a Dementia Diagnosis
A dementia diagnosis rarely affects just one person. While the diagnosis is given to an individual, its impact often extends to spouses, children, siblings, grandchildren, and close friends. Each person brings their own relationship, fears, beliefs, and coping mechanisms to the situation. As a result, one of the first challenges many families face after a dementia diagnosis is simply figuring out how to talk about it. Some family members want detailed information immediately.
shawneecanjura
Jun 154 min read


What To Do After a Dementia Diagnosis: 10 First Steps for Families
Receiving a dementia diagnosis can feel overwhelming. Many families leave the doctor's office with a mixture of emotions—relief, fear, sadness, confusion, and uncertainty about what comes next. You may find yourself wondering how quickly things will change, what you should be doing right now, and whether you're prepared for what lies ahead. If you're feeling overwhelmed, you're not alone. One of the most important things to understand is that a dementia diagnosis does not req
shawneecanjura
Jun 154 min read


Finding Meaning in Dementia Caregiving
When a loved one is diagnosed with dementia, most families are immediately introduced to a narrative centered on loss. They are told what abilities will disappear, what challenges lie ahead, and what they should expect as the disease progresses. While this information is important, it often leaves caregivers with the impression that the future contains little beyond hardship, grief, and decline. When my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, that was certainly the mes
shawneecanjura
Jun 124 min read


How to Avoid Resenting a Parent With Dementia
Few caregivers want to admit it, but resentment is one of the most common emotions in dementia caregiving. It is also one of the most misunderstood. Many caregivers believe that if they truly loved their parent, they wouldn't feel frustrated, angry, trapped, or resentful. As a result, these feelings often remain hidden beneath layers of guilt and self-judgment. The truth is that resentment does not mean you love your parent any less. More often, it is a sign that your own nee
shawneecanjura
Jun 124 min read


When Every Day Feels the Same: The Hidden Monotony of Dementia Caregiving
When people talk about dementia caregiving, they often focus on the big emotions: grief, stress, exhaustion, frustration, and burnout. These challenges are real, but there is another aspect of caregiving that is rarely discussed despite being incredibly common. Monotony. Many dementia caregivers find themselves living the same day over and over again. The same questions. The same routines. The same responsibilities. The same concerns. Days become weeks, weeks become months, a
shawneecanjura
Jun 124 min read


7 Signs of Dementia Caregiver Burnout
Most dementia caregivers expect to feel stressed from time to time. What many don't realize is that caregiver burnout often develops gradually. Because the demands of caregiving increase over time, it can be difficult to recognize when normal stress has evolved into something more serious. Many caregivers spend months—or even years—pushing through exhaustion, telling themselves they just need to work harder, be more patient, or stay positive. In reality, caregiver burnout is
shawneecanjura
Jun 124 min read


Why Dementia Caregivers Feel So Isolated (And What Helps)
When people think about the challenges of dementia caregiving, they often picture exhaustion, stress, and burnout. While those experiences are certainly common, one of the most difficult aspects of caring for a loved one with dementia is something that receives far less attention: isolation. A quiet living room with an empty chair symbolizing caregiver isolation Many dementia caregivers describe feeling alone in ways they never expected. Friends stop calling. Invitations beco
shawneecanjura
Jun 124 min read
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